It’s tempting to look back on decisions about relationships, jobs and various other choices that didn’t go well and consider them to be mistakes. In reality though, it’s just piling on. You already had a hard time, now you are blaming yourself for it.
We are always making life decisions with imperfect information. You don’t choose things that you are sure will go badly, it just happens sometimes. And it’s not a mistake to try something. You were curious; you wanted to know something. If you hadn’t done the thing, you might still be wondering what would have happened if you had tried it.
You understood this as a toddler. When you fell down after your first attempt at walking, you didn’t say, “Well that was a mistake. If I had know I might fall, I would never have tried walking”. You tried again and again, adjusting your balance and developing muscle strength and coordination each time.
Regardless of the outcome of your adult endeavors, you did learn something. You had an experience; you satisfied your curiosity, and that’s important. You can take what you learned and try something else. So applaud yourself for doing the brave thing, for trying and learning.